Recently a very good friend of mine had a falling out with a business partner. I don’t know the details but I was supportive. Then a couple of weeks later the business partner removed me from twitter.com (I use Twitter Quitter to track these things).
I ask why she unfollowed and blocked me on twitter so I can never follow her again? She mentioned it may be an overreaction but then retracted when she thought I supported my friend more than her. I don’t know the details to offer an opinion.
What makes no sense is why I was unfollowed and blocked on twitter and facebook for something that I have nothing to do with. It looks immature. I was completely not involved and wasn’t getting involved. I in fact didn’t care. But, then this person’s husband email me and my friend accounting details about the argument. Again I have no idea what this has to do with me. I responded asking how this involves me. Why anyone would email private accounting details to someone that isn’t involved in this I have no idea. My only guess is they want to prove their point to someone else. Why I would care I have no idea.
So what is the lesson out of all this?
- When people are upset don’t “talk” via email. Upset people read emails and think they mean something entirely different from what the person wrote. I personally switch from email to phone after two tense emails, I think it should be one if it is especially bad.
- Talking things through works much better.
- Threatening that you’ll unleash an attack never seen before is immature. Telling someone that they are barred from talking to you is immature. Let’s be adults and talk things thru.
- Blocking people that have nothing to do with a conflict just makes you look like the one at fault and is rude.
- Sending personal accounting details to someone not involved is an evasion of privacy and simply rude. (To my friend, I didn’t read it and was shocked when I got it)
- Don’t get involved in other people’s conflicts if you know any of them unless asked. People will think you are biased. Suggest a mediator instead which I did, no response yet.
- Pick your fights. If you believe they will get extremely upset and start spreading rumors and it isn’t worth pursing the matter then just drop it and move on.
I believe all conflict can be eliminated if people will communication and all conflict is a lack of communication.
On a side note that may or may not have anything to do with this particular case:
- Not transferring money because you owe the another person money is a form of money laundering. I’ve seen people do this on a much much bigger scale and go to jail. Just pay what is owed and let the dollars fall where they be. Tax collectors don’t like it either.
- Use affiliate links when doing business with partners at all times, no matter what. Claiming people are your sales and you didn’t use an affiliate link is bad business.
- Refusing to send an accounting report for weeks doesn’t help.
Blocking people on twitter is almost worthless as you can to to their twitter feed on twitter.com/ and then their username. People can still put you in replies on twitter. It does remove people from being able to direct message you when you block them.
So I have one person that is blocking me on twitter now and removed me as a friend on Facebook. I can live with it since I can’t do anything about it and I couldn’t have done anything to prevent it from happening. I hope it make the person feel better. And I hope this anonymous post helps you and my friend move on with life and that the attacks will end. You both deserve happiness.
P.S. Does anyone know of a web application that let’s you know who is blocking you? Twitter Quitter only tells you when people quit following you on twitter.
Tags: etiquette, social media, twitter
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